Friday, February 19, 2016 at 1:54 AM with

It has been awhile since i blog at this timing. 
Well just wanted to get some things off my mind. 

Maybe it's my period that cause me to feel this way (it's true) but i won't say it's entirely because of that. Some of these stuff has been on my mind for quite some time already.

This week was fine i guess? Just another week but it wasn't that good either. Was trying to save up money but circumstances due to my carelessness ended up making me spent more than what i should. 

I said that i will catch up with my work from tues to thurs. I tried but it was only the bare minimum. I seriously hate it when things don't go my way; but things doesn't always have to go my way anyways. But still it's like a series of bad things that happened one after another within the same day which makes it rather depressing.

Was talking with my roomie earlier today (or ytd) that time really flies. Like when we were in sem 1, we find time pass rather slowly. Now that it's sem 2, it's going to be our recess week after next week. Which means ITC is coming and halfway till finals.

Speaking of ITC, i am legit tired of repeating the same stuff. It just fucking makes me look like someone finding excuses to cover up for everything i can't do. Like seriously. The only reason why i repeat certain stuff it's because i can't say it to the person's face. Although i was sad that i really de-proved a lot compared to before and i was still kinda glad that i didn't manage to get picked for team. 

Honestly, i also don't want to burden the team just because i dont have the fucking motivation. I also don't find my current self suitable for the team event. I don't really blame the training here but also because partially, i just don't feel people pushing me, making me wanting to work hard. Hence, making me feel damn nua. I know i need to find back the motivation, i need to be responsible for my spot. I can't just keep getting stuck here like this because of some stuff. But sometimes, not everything is that easy to let go and to move on with life.

Well, suppose to be studying now but had the urge to blog. Not going to sleep that early because i just had lots of food lol. Was on a binge eating mood.

That's all for tonight everyone. Have a good night rest.
Ciaos.

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Xi Tong, 20歳.
Singapore // Gemini

"Embrace the glorious mess you are." - Elizabeth Gilbert
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